Saturday, February 12, 2011

Boo Hoo Poor ME!!!

As upbeat as my recent posts have sounded, I am only human and this has taken a toll on me and my family. My kids for one are acting out like crazy, and as I try to find a middle ground between giving in all the time and beating them ;) it has become a constant battle for the upper ground! Today I'm winning but we shall see how the day progresses. Subconsciously I tell myself that they are dealing with a lot and that they are taking direction from a lot of people and all this is not normal so of course they are acting out....consciously I am ready to scream!

Then there is this thing called a marriage, which after 6+ years (and 12 years together) I feel like we have pretty well mastered. Yet somehow this pesky little disease has thrown a corkscrew in our (seemingly) perfect little lives! We have been fighting about stupid stuff, and I mean stupid stuff!!!! Like the tone that is used, or lack of interest in our common interests, etc. etc. etc... Again subconsciously I know why this is happening but somehow it doesn't make me feel better to know exactly why my life currently sucks. I'm just ready to get back to normal, and sadly the journey has just begun. I don't doubt that at the end of this we will all be stronger, better people because of this time of trial but today I'm letting myself be weak and say I DON'T LIKE THIS!

So as your week goes on and you keep us in your thoughts please pray we are able to come together as our little family unit and find our happy place again. I know it won't look the same as it did before but I'm confident that we can still find our groove and move forward.

Halloween 2010 "The Rubble's and Dino"

8 comments:

  1. We love you and we're praying for you!

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  2. I have too many thoughts to write them down but here are a few.

    As you forge your way through this challenging time, somehow you just have to know that it will make you and your marriage stronger. I am pretty sure you did not see your life as perfect before, you already have a new found admiration for what it was.

    You will get through it and then you will have such a respect for your regular life.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you, and I am always here for an ear to listen, a glass of wine, dinner or child care. You know I like to help.

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  3. Yes, poor YOU! For lack of a better description, this totally sucks!!! But, as usual, I'm amazed and inspired by your spirit, how grounded and real you are, and how insightful. The fact that you can, even if just for a moment, take a step back and recognize the temporary (albeit intense, terrifying, and challenging) nature of your circumstances and believe in your future is a testament to your resiliency. Your beautiful little family and marriage are just as resilient. You won't be the same, ever. I'd venture to guess that you, individually and collectively, will be stronger, more grounded, more grateful for every moment, and more committed. It's okay to let yourself give in and feel weak sometimes. One of the many benefits of being who you are and having created such an amazing village for your family is that people are waiting on your doorstep to support you. Let us. SO, can I take those sweet, crazy boys off your hands sometime this weekend? Or take you out for a drink? Or do your laundry? Honestly. Whatever helps.

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  4. Ditto what Erin said! And let her do your laundry - that's her thing! ;-) Love to you all!!!!!

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  5. Thank you all for your kind words...I know I am only human but it is amazing having such great friends to catch me as I fall! :) I love you all and will be calling on everyone in the days to come!

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  6. Prayers Liz! Yes...these times of pain and suffering and fear do SUCK...and it's ok to feel whatever you need to feel and get it out...write, exercise, talk, cry...whatever you need to do. And then when you persevere you will find such wisdom and grounding and strength. I really believe that in order to truly appreciate our lives we have to feel the highs and the lows. Oh! you should go get a massage Liz- you know how good that would be for you! Do it for yourself :)

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