Thursday, June 23, 2011

The birds and the bees

As parents we all know there will come a day when we have to talk to our kids about the birds and the bees, but I think we all expect that day to come when they are closer to understanding it all. I know I was shocked as a mother of boys when from a very early age they would get an erection. I know it wasn't anything they were controlling or even aware of since it's literally been almost since birth. I also remember my sister re-counting her kid’s bath time to me years ago; she said one of her daughters had been screaming from the tub "MOM!! MOM!" so of course she went running. She was surprised to see they were fine and says, "Why were you screaming? Are you ok?" Her daughter innocently replies "Mom did you know I can stick my whole finger inside?" (That still makes me chuckle and glad I have sons) She calmly replied, "Yes, I did know" and promptly walked out 

I guess I'm writing today more out of confusion than anything else.  My sons have always loved being naked. They would rather run in the sprinklers naked than with a suit, they spend most of the day at home without bottoms on, and it doesn't bother me one bit. I also know Sawyer is and has been for a while curious about the female body. He asks me about my body when he sees me naked and he's started asking why he can't see other women naked, and we have caught him and some girl friends checking each others business out. Today I got a call from a friend that we had dinner with a few days ago that was concerned because when we were there all the kids had bathed together, and apparently my son had asked her daughter to stand up so he could see her "privates" and then touched her and then he stood and instructed her to do the same to him. I do think there is some innocence to this, but I also think it's not appropriate. My confusion is in explaining all that to my son. I don't want him to grow up thinking sex, or looking at women, or anything related to that is bad.  I just want him to have an understanding about other people’s levels of comfort and about how self-exploration is ok, but exploring others needs to wait until you are older.

We had a good conversation today, and I do believe he is starting to understand, but for now a new rule is in place in my house, no co-ed baths. Oh and in case it wasn't obvious, being a parent is hard work, but that's ok because I've always liked a challenge! :)


  1. lucky punk. that shit never works for me...

  2. haha Who is Anonymous? That's some funny shit. Almost as funny as the struggles your kid is throwing at you!

    You're doing great. Keep it up. I just wanted to tease before I complimented you. At his age it's totally just curiousity (and hot little freinds j/k!). Be confident (not embarrassed) and work on boundries. Keep the conversations going. I think if you raise him to respect women the sex part will naturally be easy.

    Love you sis

  3. amen to the that! Natural and Normal! love you