Monday, November 26, 2012


So honestly I have a lot of amazing things to tell you all about, but I feel like they should get there own special "my village is amazing-post!" But as a prelude to that check out these websites for a sneak peak:

                                               KeepCalm&FuckCancer                        Stella&Dot     

What I really need though is to get some s%!T off my chest!  Quite a few times in the last week the same topic has been brought up, by different people, at different times, and it's really bothering me! Why do woman feel the need to belittle other woman? Really any woman and it's obnoxious but when a mother talks badly about another mother or makes her feel like she's not doing a good job some part  of me wants to scream!!!

Here's the deal, being a mom is a pretty thankless job, and it's hard every single day. It doesn't matter how much money you have in your bank account, how young you are, how old you are, if you breast feed or bottle feed, if you had a c-section or if you used no drugs... being a parent is work. Period. By no means am I saying that it doesn't come with loads of joy (day drinking was never so fun pre-kids) but with that unimaginable joy there comes a lot of guilt, stress, self loathing.....should I go on?  You get the picture? I understand that there are people who are not or should not be able to be parents, but in   general I believe most of us are doing everything we can to provide our children with everything they need. Being "financially stable" does not make you a good parent. Just like choosing to have your child in a hospital with the use of an epidural does not mean you will be a bad parent. Loving and providing for your child makes you a good parent.

I understand that we all have preconceived ideas of what being a parent will be like, but then we become parents and everything we thought we knew goes out the window.  Why is saying: "I was wrong, sleep training is where it's at." or  "Huh, who knew I would like co-sleeping so much." so hard for some people. Pretending that you don't have bad days, or that you don't struggle on a daily basis with something isn't helping anyone. All it does is make some of us feel like failures. For the record having someone tell you that you are failing, at a game that has no rules, that you already feel inadequate to play, sucks! Stop shitting on the only people in the world who understand how hard it is to be you.

These are my boys on their birthdays. Memories that always make me smile. Moments that only a mother can relate to. Stories I love to tell every mother I meet. Ladies why not embrace this bond that we have? Why not create an amazing village for each other?  A village where we can share our joys and cry on each others shoulders on the bad days! I know how easy it is to judge what someone else is doing but next time right before you do, please I beg you, please think for a moment I bet she's doing the best she can, in this moment...and it's enough.  Then maybe offer her a drink! ;)

ok rant over-

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